look what you can do to me

I strive hard to not let go
& strive harder to be your shadow.
it takes a lot to hold back the tears
its pain and disdain which come with the fears.
i will heal,in time like everybody else
but i doubt the memory will escape me soon.
i know here the fault's mine alone to endure
but i'm also aware that my feelings are pure.
sometimes i feel so oblivious,so helpless
i guess it'll take time to clear this mess.
I believe not in giving up in a single try
maybe that's the reason i end up hurt many more times.
I wish i was a rock which could feel no pain
trust me,i have tried being one...but in vain.
I let you be the centre of my world
i let u give me warmth when the rest were cold.
But i guess i was happy too soon
din't know it's a dark night with no moon.
i'll crawl back to my corner in the room
and sleep before this sadness can croon.
i want to wake up with just silence around
with a feeling of nothingness that is so profound.
Coz i don't like the voices i hear in my head
i wish in a jiffy, they are all just dead.
I feel sorry i ever felt this way
but my dreams are being taken away.
Pursue i still will with all of my heart
coz it'd be crazy to simply let it fall apart.
i'll let you be a witness to my clueless state
judge me as u wish, it won't change my fate.

everything has a price to pay

why is it that we run after something that is so hard to achieve,a person who won't be 'the one' however much u pursue them? in either case, we try really really hard, put all of our heart in it, lose sleep over such matters only to realise there is a price to pay. in the matters of the heart,it is pain,hurt and grievance that serves as the bill. we let the tears happen...endure,grieve and move on. learning something new from such an experience, we try to apply those lessons in future to our daily situations. but does it really help? do we really forget completely what we left behind? it comes back to you once in a while...haunting u like the ghosts of the past.sometimes u feel that it's only your shallow heart that's beating. but there is one thing someone once told me, "Listen to the voice within... it speaks the clearest and the purest of ur thoughts".It is true...it does work.we may not really like what we hear it say, but then it never lets u stray.it tells u that yes, there are a lot of things involved when you go for what you really want.sometimes it needs sacrifices on our part,may make us feel frustrated,helpless,humiliated or sad.but there is no gain without pain.It tells you that if you want something that badly, it is worth every try.....making u aware of the consequences,yet pushing you to try hard, to touch the most toughest spots, to be focussed, to let not the world stop you! It is then that you make a decision,being completely conscious of all the pro's and cons. The best part's yet to come...and that happens when you stick by your decision.